Unsolicited Advice

Dear Liv, Leave Beyonce Alone & Focus On Your Career. You’ve Got A Lot of Work Ahead of You… (Unsolicited Advice)


Dear Liv,

So thank you, for posting that music video of yours.  It confirmed this world is filled with questionable people (such as yourself).

Let’s talk about that video—”I’m Sorry Mrs. Carter.”  Hmmm. Well this says a lot already.  So, you allegedly hooked up with Jay, or denied him a hookup from what I understand, and now you’re rapping to Queen Bey.  Correct me if I’m wrong but you seem to think you’re in a position of high power after posting this video.  You obviously need to get a grip on reality.

No one tops Beyonce.

But it’s sad that you seem to think so.  You ruined a perfectly good week for me and I’m not happy about it at all.  You’re looking for attention, and as I’m sure you’ve already figured out, you didn’t do such great job at it.

So let me lay down some thoughts for you and maybe, just maybe, you can disappear and people will forget this ever happened:

  1. Get a real job.  Allegedly sneaking around with high profile celebs and making pointless videos does not classify as a real job.  Neither does throwing shade at Beyonce.  In fact, you should be kissing the ground that she walks on for not taking you down (let’s face it, she could destroy you.)
  2. Take a video production class.  What is this?  Amateur hour?  A 10-year-old could have done a better editing job.  If you’re going to take this road for publicity, at least put some effort in.  Oh, consider throwing some rap lessons in there too.
  3. Find someone else to pick on.  This is Beyonce and Jay-Z you’re dealing with here.  Mr. and Mrs. Carter, king and queen of the freaking world.  Do you really have nothing better to do?  Everything was going so nicely in the world of Bey and Jay until you ruined.  Way.  To.  Go.
  4. Consider refraining from the media in the near future.  Think before you speak.  It’s pretty clear that claiming you “didn’t intend to out Jay-Z” is a flat out lie.  And when you say things like this, you look like an air-head.  Just go away and everything will be fine again, cool?

While we all sit here a debate of whether or not you’ve done this for attention, we call all agree on two things:  You shouldn’t be a rapper, and your song is awful.

Don’t try and top The Queen Bey, ever, again.

Yours truly,


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