9 People The Black Delegation Wants To Trade Right Now

Mos Def Racial Draft

The rules of celebrities in the media have changed. You no longer have to have talent or a bankable skill to be famous. All you need is a controversial opinion and a social media account and you can be famous, too. However, the sword of social media is double-edged. While one can earn their fifteen seconds of fame by being a jackass, other more established stars can be a detriment to themselves. Whenever someone famous has acted out of turn, Black Twitter has dropped the hammer like Chris Hemsworth.

If you are a repeat offender of Black Twitter, you will be sent to the Black Delegation for review. If the delegation deems a person has worn out their welcome in the black community, they will be put up for the racial draft (inspired by the brilliant sketch from “Chappelle’s Show.”) The following nine people have had their franchise tags removed and trade talks have begun. The worst offenders may be released to waivers just to clear cap space. We want them gone that badly. Check out why these nine people must be traded to another race.



We all came to love Raven as little Olivia on” The Cosby Show.” Unfortunately, Bill Cosby isn’t the only one to go on and tarnish the image of the groundbreaking sitcom. Her crimes aren’t as serious as those of the alleged ones of Bill Cosby, but the Black Delegation would still like to get Raven-Symone all the way out of the paint. First, homegirl said she was from every continent in Africa. Every. Continent. In. Africa. Considering there are only seven continents on the planet-Africa being one of them-we can’t seem to work out the math here. If that weren’t enough, Raven most recently said that she won’t hire people with “ghetto” black names because names are the only indicator of someone’s job performance. The thing is, her name is Raven-Symone Christina Pearman and she was born in Atlanta. If she didn’t grow up on television, she would be the around-the-way girl who swears up and down that her name was French because her great-great-great granddaddy on her mother’s side was Creole.

Ben Carson


He may be a gifted brain surgeon, but Ben Carson is all so out of his damn mind. We knew Carson was a little off his rocker before he decided to announce his run for president as a Republican. Everybody is entitled to their opinion, but Black Republicans always seem to come off more self-loathing than conservative. Carson’s presidential run has been the gift that keeps on giving if you’re looking for reasons he should be nowhere near a political race. When he was asked what he would do if he was a student at the Oregon college that recently had a shooting, he said he would’ve tackled the gunman. He’s also said Muslims aren’t fit to be leaders of this country and even gone as far as to offer that Jews could’ve stopped the Holocaust. Go home, Ben Carson. You’re drunk.

Anthony Mackie


Actor Anthony Mackie is a habitual line stepper. During an interview promoting his latest film Our Brand Is Crisis, he said that he’d “drink the Kool-Aid” and be Donald Trump’s campaign manager. Sir, you can’t star in a Spike Lee joint, albeit his worst one, then turn around and endorse Donald Trump for president. That’s like Farrakhan signing an endorsement deal with a bacon company. Mackie came out later and said it was a bad joke, but nobody was drinking THAT Kool-Aid because Mackie has been known to disrespect Black people before this. He came under fire for advising his nephew not to grow dreadlocks and his portrayal of 2pac in Notorious was so bad, that petitions were called for the Tupac hologram to replace him in the DVD release. The actor did say he’ll never play a rapper again because people hated his characterization of the Death Row rapper so much he has been ready to fight fans a few times. Anthony Mackie is also a sexist, claiming a woman’s role is to “go make daddy a sandwich.” Marvel needs to clip Falcon’s wings stat. 

Kanye Kardashian


What exactly happened to Kanye West? Where did he go? This person whom we now call Kanye West isn’t Kanye West. He’s Kanye Kardashian. He’s no longer the rapper/producer who spit honest and witty rhymes about materialism and the rent being too damn high. Now, he’s a clothing designer who’s trying to turn homelessness into a fashion statement. Not to mention his comments on race have been perplexing to say the least. He told one publication that racism was a “dated concept” and a “distraction” in another.  But then turned around and said that he was being discriminated against in the fashion world for not being gay.  Please remove this pod person and bring back the Kanye that said “George Bush doesn’t care about Black people” on live television.

Don Lemon

Don Lemon meme

Something in CNN’s milk isn’t clean and its name is Don Lemon. Don Lemon tries so hard to be down but you just want to punch him in the throat for his efforts. If we didn’t know how ratings keep people employed, one would have to ask how he still has a damn job. Nobody trusts him, even the people in Ferguson who stood behind him during a live broadcast threw shade. His attempt to have a conversation about the n-word was a fail. Was there really a need to hold up a sign with the epithet on it and ask “does this offend you”? It offends me like slavery, the lack of civil rights, and racial profiling offend me as a black man. But Lemon wouldn’t know any of that because he thinks dressing well, minding your manners in the presence of massa, and getting a respectable haircut keeps the racism away. He needs to be traded just so he can have the moment when he realizes he’s seen as just another one of us. 

Whoopi Goldberg


Raven-Symone’s “The View” co-host Whoopi Goldberg is here because she doesn’t believe America is a racist country. Someone please help her spot the lie because she’s blind to it. How is America not a racist country? How, Sway? America still lives and breathes systemic racism and oppression. America is so racist, white people are out here protesting Star Wars for having a Black man in a leading role, despite Darth Vader being voiced by a Black Man. Whoopi, you’ve got to do better.

Christon Scriven

This name isn’t as popular as the others on the list. However, it’s one of the most serious. Christon Scriven was the black friend to Dylan Roof, the shooter in the Charleston Church Massacre. According to Scriven, he heard Roof rant about committing mass murders but didn’t take it seriously because they were drunk. After walking into a church and murdering nine innocent people in cold blood, Scriven claimed Dylan Roof wasn’t a racist and they were best friends. Christon even went as far as to say he still loved Dylan Roof in spite of killing nine black people to incite a race war. If that’s love, hate me.

Black Confederate Flag Supporters

Black people who support flying the Confederate flag baffle me. You don’t mind walking around and seeing a flag created that says you are less than human? If you want to state petty facts, General Robert E. Lee and his squad lost the Civil War. When a black person waves the Confederate flag, they’re saying they have Stockholm Syndrome and are proud to be a loser. Lincoln’s motivation for freeing slaves had more to do with eliminating the threat to capitalism than ending the unjust treatment of people of color, but the Emancipation Proclamation was still put into effect. Stop holding on to the agony of a defeat from 150 years ago.

Stacey Dash


She’s a Black Republican who is fine as hell, but is slower than a snail on muscle relaxers. Not only does she work for Fox News, she believes the #BlackLivesMatter Movement should be labeled a terrorist group. If black people fighting for their lives to be to be viewed as worth something is terrorism, then we need to discuss how we define the government’s school to prison pipeline. She just keeps making her run in “Clueless” seem more prophetic everyday.

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