TV

The 18 Best Darius-Isms From ‘Atlanta’

Atlanta Darius quotes

The season finale of Donald Glover‘s Atlanta had everyone in their feeling on Tuesday night, and why wouldn’t it? A show so steeped in Black culture and perspectives that it grabbed right at the core of Black Twitter every Tuesday for nine straight weeks? That’s a no-brainer. And the slight touches of hyperreality in the invisible car and Black Justin Bieber made things feel just surreal enough to warrant all those comparisons to Twin Peaks. 

But the one character we’ve all gravitated toward by far is Lakeith Stanfield as Darius. He’s second to none as the show’s spacey comic relief, your best friend on edibles and woke to a thousand. We love him so much, we decided to grab some of his best quotes, episode to episode. Check out our favorites below.

Atlanta Darius friends

Ep 1. “The Big Bang”

“Where’s that dog with the Texas on him?”

Atlanta Darius dog Texas

 

“If you could use a rat as a phone, that’d be genius. There’s five rats for every one person in New York alone. Everybody would have an affordable phone.”

Atlanta Darius rat

“I was just wondering, could I measure your tree?”

Atlanta Darius tree

“I like Flo Rida. Moms need to be able to enjoy rap, too.”

Ep 2. “Streets On Lock”

On prison food: “The food in here is genetically modified to make you high.”

 

“As humans, we’re always close to destruction. Life itself is but a series of close calls. I mean, how would you know you were alive unless you knew you could die?”

Atlanta Darius destruction

“Is Paper Boi Atlanta’s Tupac? They said no.”

Atlanta Darius Tupac
Ep 4: “The Streisand Effect”

“Your assumed perversion to the word daddy? I think that’s stemming from a fear of mortality.”

Atlanta Darius daddy

“AIDS was created to keep Wilt Chamberlin from beating Steve McQueen’s sex record. By 1969, he was already #3 on the all-time list. By ’71, he would’ve beat that boy for sure.”

 

“Most Black people don’t know who Steve McQueen is.”

 

“Take this phone. I get a new one every month; to make sure they ain’t tracking me.”

Atlanta Darius phone
Ep 5: “Nobody Beats The Biebs”

“Why would I shoot a human target? I mean, that’s weird, right?”

Atlanta Darius dog
Ep 8: “The Club”

On why a girl wants Paper Boi: “20% of my drinks are free. I’m that guy. People see me and they wanna give me free drinks; what can I say?”

 

“Because she would’ve been noticed this creepy look I’ve been giving her. Psychology.”

Atlanta Darius psychology

To a club bouncer: “Question: have you ever had to throw out another bouncer?”

 

“I’m gonna watch people smoke.”

Ep 10: “The Jacket”

“I think if we spent the time we spent thinking about not spending money and spent that time on spending money, then it’d be time well spent.”

“I ate them two blunts when the cops came. Tonight’s gonna be weird.”

 

To Top